RESOURCE TEXT
Experience Sharing | Mindset Tips for PhD Application Season
Topic
Navigating the Emotional Ups and Downs of PhD Application Season
Speaker
Lulu Tong
About the Speaker
- Neuroscience major, UC San Diego
- Research Assistant at UCSF
- A self-described “veteran” of neuroscience PhD applications
- Sharing reflections from personal experience during the application cycle
Looking Back on Application Season
From Lulu Tong, 2023:
This is a reflection on my PhD application season and some of the lessons I learned after going through both the application process and graduation.
September | Getting Started
I began preparing my applications in September.
Based on my research experience, technical skills, and recommendation letters, I felt that I had a reasonable chance of applying to highly competitive programs. I was fairly confident at the beginning. I also decided not to apply to programs that I would not genuinely want to attend, even if they might be considered “safer” options.
My early conversations with potential faculty mentors were also fairly encouraging, which gave me even more confidence going into the application season.
October–November | Writing, Rewriting, and Feeling Overwhelmed
By October, I finally had the first draft of my application essays.
I spent most of October and November revising them again and again. I went through more than ten versions and asked friends and senior lab members for feedback countless times. At one point, I felt like I was thinking about my essays even in my sleep.
My only wish at the time was that I would succeed on the first try, because I really did not want to go through another application season.
The first—and only—time I completely broke down happened in mid-November, right before my essays and applications were ready to submit.
A senior member of my lab had kindly offered to give me a mock interview. She told me that interviews could begin quickly once applications were submitted, so it would be helpful to prepare early.
But I did poorly in the mock interview. My responses were slow, and I felt that many of my answers missed the point. I was already feeling discouraged.
About half an hour later, my cousin contacted me about visiting California during winter break and asked me to help plan the trip.
At that moment, I suddenly thought:
“I don’t even know whether I can make it through this month. How am I supposed to think about where to go on vacation?”
I went to the restroom and cried for about ten minutes.
Tip 1 | Allow Yourself to Feel Your Emotions
It is okay to have emotions, and it is okay to let them out. But it is also important to understand where those emotions are coming from.
Feeling anxious, frustrated, or overwhelmed during application season is completely understandable.
After calming down, I realized that my breakdown had three main sources:
- Uncertainty about the future.
I had no idea where I would be the following year, and that lack of control made me anxious.
- Conflicting feedback on my application essays.
I had asked many people to review my writing, but everyone had different opinions. Constantly revising the same essays based on inconsistent feedback became exhausting.
- Disappointment with my mock interview performance.
I was already stressed and frustrated, and performing poorly made me start thinking that I was doing everything badly.
Once I understood where each emotion was coming from, the situation became much easier to manage.
Some uncertainty in applications is unavoidable. You cannot know exactly what an admissions committee is looking for, how they will interpret your experiences, or what will happen in a particular year.
The mock interview was also useful—but at that moment, I realized that I was simply trying to prepare for too many future problems at once.
Tip 2 | Do Not Solve Tomorrow’s Problems Today
Take the process one step at a time. Do not force yourself to deal with things that have not happened yet.
I am someone who likes making plans, so uncertainty was especially difficult for me.
Eventually, I realized that I could not control the outcome of my applications. I could only control what I did before submitting them.
That left me with two practical goals:
First, make my applications as strong as I could within my current abilities.
If I had done everything I reasonably could, then I could accept whatever happened afterward.
Second, create Plan B and Plan C.
I asked myself:
What would I do if the PhD applications did not work out?
The two most realistic alternatives were pursuing a master’s degree or working as a research assistant for another one or two years.
Then I asked another question:
Could I accept spending one or two additional years taking one of those paths?
The answer was yes.
Once I realized that even my “worst-case scenario” was something I could accept, the uncertainty became much less frightening.
And sometimes the best thing to do was much simpler: go look at the ocean, get some ice cream, take the evening off, and stop thinking about applications for a few hours.
Tip 3 | Application Season Is Important, but Your Life Still Matters
It is easy to let applications occupy every part of your day.
But taking a break, seeing friends, exercising, eating something you enjoy, or simply doing nothing for an evening does not mean you are taking the process less seriously.
Sometimes stepping away is exactly what allows you to come back with a clearer mind.
December–March | Rejections and Plan B
After submitting all of my PhD applications, the rejection emails gradually started arriving.
So I activated Plan B: applying for research assistant positions.
Between an RA position and a master’s program, I felt that working as an RA would better support my long-term goals.
I revisited the laboratories I had been interested in during the PhD application process and began reaching out broadly. I adapted many of my existing application materials—including parts of my statements—to prepare cover letters and research-related emails.
The process itself did not always take an enormous amount of time each day, but it stretched over several months.
Tip 4 | A Rejection Does Not Mean You Are Not Good Enough
A rejection is one decision made within one particular application cycle.
It may be useful to talk with mentors, senior students, or peers about areas of your application that could be strengthened and then work on those areas.
But do not let a rejection become evidence, in your mind, that you are incapable of succeeding in research.
There are many ways to reach the same destination, and sometimes the timing simply is not right yet.
April–May | Interviews and a New Direction
Eventually, faculty members began responding to my RA applications, and I went through several interviews.
This time, I was the one choosing among opportunities.
I ultimately identified the lab I most wanted to join and began the onboarding process.
The path did not look the way I originally expected, but it still moved me toward the same long-term goal.
Tip 5 | Keep Your Recommenders Updated
Do not disappear after your recommenders submit their letters.
If you receive rejections, you do not need to feel embarrassed about telling them. Most mentors have experienced rejection many times themselves.
And when something works out, share the good news.
Let them know where you are going, what you decided, and how much you appreciated their support.
Recommendation letters may be part of the application process, but the mentorship behind those letters can matter far beyond a single application cycle.
Final Thoughts
Application season is partly about your academic background, research experience, writing, and interviews—but it is also about learning how to live with uncertainty.
You cannot control every admissions decision.
What you can control is:
- how thoughtfully you prepare;
- whether you ask for help when you need it;
- whether you build realistic alternative plans;
- how you respond when something does not work out;
- and whether you continue moving toward the kind of scientist you want to become.
Take the process seriously, but do not let it define your worth.
One step at a time—and good luck with your application season.